Photo by Alex Harries
I’ve always wanted to go to Ibiza, its something that virtually every lad here in the UK had done but somehow I’ve never got round to it. Everyone I know here has a story about fucking some girl in Ibiza. I love dance music, I love sexy ladies, I love sex and everything else that the ‘White Isle’ has to offer. I’m 27 in a few months and I’m beginning to think that if I don’t go soon, it’s going to be too late and I will just have to stick to Ibiza porn instead. So I’ve decided to do some research and plan a trip for the end of this summer. The question that I wanted to find the answer to is ‘How crazy is Ibiza’ because I only really want to go if it lives up to expectations.
What does one really want from a party place like Ibiza? Sun, Sea, Sand, Fucking, Clubs, Music and loads of drink. The problem I have with the whole “Ibiza’ thing is I have been to Magaluf a few times and you can get all those things there… What is so crazy and different about Ibiza? Well here are the results of my research:
I read on the Internet that there are more nudist beaches on the Island than anywhere else in Europe, but from what I’m reading, its not just girls trying to get a tan. They appear to be showing off their flesh TRYING to attract your attention. There is a great site called nerve.com and they have written some great advice on trying to pull girls in Ibiza. According to some dude on there, its fine to approach a topless chick on the beach, but make sure to stare at her dead in the eyes and not the tits. And the best way to make these half naked girls feel comfortable around you is take your top off too! I dunno, maybe stick some porn on as well?
Following on from naked chicks, the chances are you are going to get a chance to bang someone when you are on your wild holiday. There appears to be no shame in fucking in public here. I’m reading about sex on the beach, sex in nightclubs and sex literally in the street. You seem to be pretty much guaranteed a fuck when you go there. I think the reason for that is guys and girls all go there for it, so the chances are you are going to find someone who is up for it.
For actual dance music, you’ve got clubs like ‘Eden’, ‘Ibiza Rocks’, ‘Space’ and ‘Pacha’ but is the sex industry is booming on this island? I would have expected to see tonnes of erotic bars and strip clubs, you know, places to pay to see tits etc and was really shocked to see a lack of these types of clubs. I couldn’t get my head around it, until someone on a forum posted “there is no real need for sex clubs, because every nightclub is like a strip club” and by this I think they mean that it is kind of pointless selling sex on the white isle because girls are offering it free everywhere.
So in conclusion, Ibiza seems like a haven for people like you and me (well actually, maybe I should have gone before I got married). Booze is cheap, there is a lot of it around… you get drunk… you get fucking… you sleep and do it all over again. I really think I am going to go and try it out this summer, excluding the getting laid part. I really do think it is a crazy place to go, but its only as crazy as you make it!
I would really like to hear from anyone that has gone before, what is it really like? Is it as crazy as it sounds? If you are planning a trip, why did you choose Ibiza?
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