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I get tonnes of questions asking ‘Agony Allan’ things like… ‘How do I last longer in bed?’… ‘How do I make my dick bigger’… but this question has to be the best one I have ever received… It’s cute, it made me smile… and I want to just give the person that sent it in a big cuddle!

So here we go:

Hello Allan,

How do girls have unprotected sex during porno videos and not get pregnant?

Well… what happens is… the magical porn fairies come and remove the cum from the girls pussy… but they are magical, so therefore invisible!!

OR… the Pornstars are using some sort of contraception that you can’t see. Maybe the ‘birth control pill’ or they might even have a coil stuck up their, to be honest… most of the pornos I enjoyed result in the guys mess spraying all over the porn girls face… and I’ve never heard of a women getting pregnant that way.

Thanks for your email!!! If you have a question about porn, sex or anything like it, please send me a message through our contact form.

Allan Lake
Your RedTube Blog Host!

So more Agony Allan and todays email is:

Hey Allan,

I’m 16 and my gal is almost 17. She isn’t ready for any sex and I want it desperately. How do I kinda seduce her into it?? We have kissed before and I have even felt her entire body with my hands… unfortunately we will use a condom .

How do I start stripping her, like how do I begin the sex and how can I last long in bed such that she enjoys it…

She’s a virgin so what do I do about the hymen bleed and all???

Thanks,

Catlicker…

Thanks for the message, it’s simple as this… and this may sound boring but… Fuck it!

If she isn’t ready, then you simply shouldn’t be pushing her! She shouldn’t feel pressured to loose her virginity. So either wait, or move on and find someone else. In answer to the second part of the question, when she is ready… or if you find someone else, you should just take it easy! Not much will be expected for your first time, and its going to be a bit painful for her, but I really wouldn’t worry about how to last long in bed at this stage. Getting a girl to bed should be your goal! But one that wants sex!

As for hymens bleeding, neither of you are going to care about that, there is something special about the first time, so I doubt it will even factor in! Dude, chill out, wait for her or find someone else, and stop planning it so much! Just go with the flow, you can start putting more effort in once you’ve had practice!

Your thoughts?

Allan Lake
Your RedTube Blog Host!

This a question I get given a lot, so today I will answer:

Of course every guy wants to pleasure who he’s fucking. I mean, duhh! But when can you ACTUALLY tell that shes not faking? How can you be sure when shes liking what shes getting?

That’s a good question, and the real truth is that you can’t! Some girls are really quiet, so that makes you worry that you are not doing a good job… some girls are too loud, so you think they are over compensating. I think guys just worry about pleasing their women far too much! Trust me, girls don’t give it as much thought! If your girl doesn’t fucking leave you after your first few shags, then the chances are, you are probably doing an okay job!

In all seriousness, I am right! In these situations, you are usually worrying about nothing… but there is not harm in actually just asking her what she likes, what you could do more of! My wife never moans at me for how I am in bed, but every now and then I bother to ask ‘what turns you on?’.

The art to pleasing your women is to make her cum first, whether it be licking, fingering… whatever! Then after she is sorted, and your mind is at rest, you can sort yourself out! Remember, women don’t cum during sex all the time, so don’t give yourself too much of a hard time! No pun intended!

If you’ve got a question, use our contact page to send it it!

Allan Lake

Your RedTube Blog Host!

Fuck all this fun stuff, tits everywhere and dicks pointing at you from every direction, its now time for the very serious Agony Allan section of this blog!

Today email reads:

Hey, I was wondering. Is there any way that I can last longer in bed? Like I only did it 2 times and they went quick is there a way to last a really long time?

Ah my friend, I feel your pain! I don’t last very long either, but there are a
couple of things that work for me, so maybe if you try them you will be able to keep that fucking wolf from the door for a little bit longer.

1) Have a wank before you have sex! Not in front of your woman obviously, but nip to the loo and shoot your muck a bit, when you have a bit of foreplay, you will get hard again and during sex you will last longer as your gonads are not ready to explode just yet!

2) Viagra- Apparently it makes you last longer, but I’ve taken it before and it makes me last about the same amount of time. BUT after you cum, you stay hard and can go again, so its a good option! Be careful though, it is a drug and should be treated with caution!

3) Think of your granny! Works for me, just at that point when I think I am going to blow my load, I stick a thought that isn’t sexy in my brain, i.e my gran! It stops me from being turned on at all sometimes! So don’t think too hard!

Hope that helps, guys if you have any suggestions for todays emailer, please comment below!!

Allan Lake
Your RedTube Blog Host!

Today we tackle a problem that I am asked about virtually everyday on the RedTube blog. How to make your dick bigger! And no, I am not offering hand jobs out okay!!

Here are just two of the many emails we get from people who are concerned about penis length:

Hi, I’m 18 and my penis only has 14 cm, I fuck almost every day with my Girlfriend,

but I think she is unsatisfied with my penis, is there any way to make it bigger?

And:

I think my dick is small. Can you let me know what you think over the web cam via messenger. Thanks!

Well, no I don’t want to see any dicks over webcam, I see enough dicks in my other job! But I understand what these guys are saying. Firstly, the average dick size is actually around 5.5 inches (or 14 cm’s) so the first emailer has nothing to worry about, and the old saying really is true… It’s what you do with it that counts! Women are usually pretty tight, so even sticking a pencil up there is going to do something, so maybe learn what to do with it instead of how to make it bigger. Plus, you fuck her everyday! Surly she wouldn’t bother if she had an issue with it.

There are some ways you can make it look bigger, shave your pubic hair… This makes your dick look bigger because your bush covers up almost an inch of your wee man if its not trimmed. Also, if you are overweight, loose some pounds! I’m skinny, but I’ve been told my dick is big, its not! It just looks that way, because I have a smaller frame.

There are some more radical things you can do, surgery on dicks is becoming as common as boob jobs! A penis extension involves fat from other parts of the body or artificial fat being inserted into your beast…  A new surgery that I heard about the other day is one where the ligament at the bottom of your dick is cut, which allows the penis to naturally reach up to an extra inch!

There are also pills that you can find online that claim to make your dick grow bigger. My favorite idea is the condom that has small weights on the bottom, you don’t wear it for sex, instead you put it on for a few hours a day as you work… apparently it slowly stretches your dick! A temporary way to make your bigger is to buy a penis pump; it only works for a short while after, but it involves using a pump over your dick to suck more blood to it…

But, you know what, I think your dicks are probably just fine, everyone has insecurities about something, and yours is dick size. It’s probably never even crossed her girls mind, what’s to say that it’s not her pussy that’s too wide? J

Before you do anything radical, just try doing some different things with it, its quality, not quantity. I’d say you have more chance of doing anal with them if you dick isn’t 8 inches! Go team you!!

To ask a question to Agony Allan about anything sex related, use our contact form.

Allan Lake
Your RedTube Blog Host!